Friday, 30 January 2009

Jep, nasi goreng telur satu!

Ibn 'Umar said, "Nothing that a man spends on himself and his family, anticipating a reward from Allah, will fail to be rewarded by Allah Almighty. He should begin with those whose support is his responsibility. If there is something left over, he should spend it on his next nearest relative and then the next nearest. If there is still something left over, he can give it away."

He is bound for Australia come this March but had sacrificed his time in Malaysia for the chemoboy.

He will have his BIG day come this December which will obviously involve a significant amount of money, yet he had spent thousands of ringgit just to get by the side of his chemoboy.

He definitely does not learn mom's cooking as eagerly as chemoboy does, yet within a month he has learned to cook beef stew which is just as good as mom's, if not better.

For all the good deeds he has done for chemoboy, Allah has definitely not missed even an iota of them. How big is the reward that Allah has promised for His servant who looks after a sick person.

O Allah, bless his soul, and reward him with Jannah. Insya Allah.

p/s: Come this Monday (chemo day), I will surely miss the boy who often prepares my nasi goreng telur for lunch.

Thursday, 22 January 2009

Today and tomorrow

Assalamualaikum wbt

Alhamdulillah, I hope I've had the toughest times post-chemo behind me now. My body's reaction to the chemotherapy has definitely been much different this time as compared to previously. I felt so much weak and lethargic even from day one. I'm surprised myself at how much rest (READ:SLEEP) I actually needed to starve off the ill-effects of the drugs.

Not only does it affect me physically, being bed-bound has in some way affected me emotionally too. It is definitely depressing not being able to do what you wish to do. I'm sure Jep must have been You-tubing some of the 'how-to-compose-yourself-against-your-mengada-ngada-brother'. He would have usually given me the stick for my rather passive demeanour, but so far he hasn't. I guess he knew that I would never intend to behave in such a manner.

Anyway, I'm feeling a bit better now, especially after treating myself to Jep's delicious Beef Stew. I need to get myself fit enough to walk to the Medical School tomorrow for two important matters. Firstly, for my GMC registration. Secondly, for a BIG result. A result I frankly don't look forward to, but I believe Allah has set out His best plans for everyone, and I should therefore be ready to accept it regardless of its outcome. Insya Allah.


Monday, 19 January 2009

The 3rd dose

Assalamualaikum wbt

1. The staff nurse had a bad day in the office. I left the hospital with 5 puncture marks on both my arms. She definitely had difficulties trying to get the cannula into my veins, and I don't blame her. Cannulation isn't the easiest thing in the world, especially when you face someone with difficult veins. Like yours truly.

2. Of the 4 cytotoxic drugs the nurse administered, I didn't like the Dacarbazine. Not only does it take longest to be infused, it gives you a horrendous stinging sensation through the arms. At times I even contemplated telling the nurse to slow the infusion rate down, or dilute the drug with more normal saline.

I can't complain though. How small is the pain I'm going through compared to the massacre taking place in Gaza. May Allah reward those in Palestine who had lost their lives for the cause of the Deen, and bring sakeenah (tranquility) into the hearts of those afflicted with the calamity.

I am not sure how my body will respond to treatment this time around, but I think it will go through the same cycle as before. Let's hope I'll be able to pick myself up sooner insya Allah.

p/s: Looking forward to Jep's second go with the Beef stew. =)

Monday, 12 January 2009

Short and sweet (both hair and latest entry...)

Assalamualaikum wbt

Thank God I've cut my hair short as a preparation for the inevitable. Or else Jep would have given me the stick for having to frequently clean and hoover the floor of our room.

Don't be deceived by the above statement though. It's not like they are profusely falling out at the moment. Saja exaggerate.

My exam is in 3 days time, and I'm working my socks off to catch up on revision. I hope I can get an isolated room to sit for my exams, as I don't want to risk catching myself an infection that one of the 240 students in my year might have in offer.

Rabbi Yassir wa la tu'assir. Rabbi tamim bil khair.

O Allah, make it easy, and do not make it difficult. O Allah, make it end well.

Countdown: 3 days (so why are u still blogging then?!) =)

Monday, 5 January 2009

Assalamualaikum wbt

I frankly am not in the mood to update, but I feel obliged to the people that have constantly been praying for me all these while.

My 2nd chemo was almost a replica of the first one, although I feel that the side effects might kick in a bit earlier this time around. Even now, I am already feeling sick.

What I expect to happen within a week from now is alopecia. Which is an inevitable side effects of chemotherapy, usually 2-3 weeks after the first dose. Let's see what happens.

But what I am more concern of, is my white cell count level. I really need to look after the food that I eat, and the environment I'm in. A week from now, I will be more neutropenic than before.

Insya Allah, I won't lie that I have a possibly difficult period ahead, what more with the impending finals in just over a week's time. But as a Muslim, I adhere strongly to what Allah has promised in His holy scripture:

"Allah does not burden any human being with a responsibility heavier than he can bear." [Al-Baqarah:286]

HasbunAllah wa ni'malwakil. Allah alone is sufficient to me.


p/s: A special thanks to Jep for preparing nasi telur ayam for my lunch today. I can confirm that the nasi telur is probably the first ever meal he has prepared personally for me without anyone else's help. =)

Saturday, 3 January 2009

What you should do before your next chemo?

Assalamualaikum wbt

Alhamdulillah, my 2nd week post-chemo was brilliant. I am not experiencing any ill-effects of the chemotherapy, and I was even able to get back to my daily routine of walking up to the masjid for the regular prayers. I am truly indebted to all my family and friends for the constant dua's for my health.

I'm really happy that with the current situation in Gaza, I could play a small part to show my concern over what has transpired since last week. At least, before the next chemotherapy this Monday, Allah has allowed me the opportunity to do what I have always wanted to do for my fellow Palestinians. To show that I care, though in the eyes of some, might seem worthless.

This is what I mean.

O Allah, let Your curse be on those unbelievers who prevent people from treading Your path, who reject Your prophets and fight Your chosen ones. O Allah, make difficult their plans, shake their feet and give them such punishment which is not turned away from a sinning people.

My next chemotherapy is on the 5th January 2009, 930am. Insya Allah.