Thursday, 20 August 2009

Being an F1 and my special Ramadhan...

Assalamualaikum wbt

I remembered a decision I made back in December 2008, when I was advised by the JPA officials (my sponsor) that I should take the last 6 months of my studies off to focus on my treatment. It took me a lot of thinking but in the end, I decided that I wasn't going to delay my studies but to give it a go. Thinking about it now retrospectively, I believed that I've made the right decision, and I can only thank Allah for that.

Two weeks ago, I took the decision to start work as a Foundation Year 1 Doctor in Royal Preston Hospital knowing that it'll only be for a short while. A decision my Consultant fully respected, and one which rather surprised him as he thought I would've opted to enjoy on an extended break from work.

Alhamdulillah, the two weeks have gone by quickly, but I have relished every single moment of it. As people often tell you, life as a doctor will never be the same as when you were a medical student. You can no longer walk away whenever trapped in a difficult situation, and there are certainly a lot more critical decision-makings involved.

I remembered vividly on my 3rd day as a doctor when I was called upon by the nurse to see a patient with a known lung cancer who was acutely short of breath, looking very distressed and was profusely sweating. There wasn't any other senior doctors around and I knew I need to act immediately whilst waiting for more help to arrive. Macam cerita kat TV lah, every second counts kan. I went through my ABC assessment (A-Airways, B-Breathing, C-Circulation) and 5 minutes later, alhamdulillah the patient settled down. As I was about to leave the patient, the nurse said a simple, yet profound statement,

"Thank you very much Doctor."

Such a straightforward statement that makes this job all worthwhile. It really does.

I guess my short journey as a doctor would have to be put to side for now as I draw near to my first course of ESHAP chemotherapy. I need to have the sutures on my Hickman line taken out tomorrow, and start doing some packing for my admission to hospital this Sunday night.

The chemotherapy will be given from Monday morning for 5 consecutive days until Friday, and I was told by my Consultant that I can be discharged for the weekend if deemed fit enough.

This will certainly be one very interesting Ramadhan for me. Firstly, that this will be my first ever Ramadhan during the summer, thus the long day. Secondly, because of the chemotherapy and therefore the prospect of fasting whilst undergoing treatment. But before I worry anyone, let me reassure that I will not put my health at risk if I don't feel able to fast, insya Allah. In a way, I look forward to 'converting' the ward I'll be in later next week into a place of worship.

A place where I will perform my obligatory and terawih prayers.

A place where I'll be reciting the Qur'an and offer my supplications.

And hopefully show to the people around me what Ramadhan is all about for Muslims. Seems interesting, huh? Insya Allah!

Yahya related to me from Malik from Abu'z Zinad from al-Araj from Abu Hurayra that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "By the One in Whose hand my self is, the smell of the breath of a man fasting is better with Allah than the scent of musk.' He leaves his desires and his food and drink for My sake. Fasting is for Me and I reward it. Every good action is rewarded by ten times its kind, up to seven hundred times, except fasting, which is for Me, and I reward it.' " [Translation of Imam Malik's Muwatta, Book 18, Number 18.22.58]

Ramadhan Kareem everyone. Kullu aam waantum bikhair.


JeP said...

Only Allah's select few can reflect on a burden as an opportunity of embrace. You, chemoboy are one of those lucky ones. Not many have been 'endowed' with the journey you've been through, lest many have faced it with such acceptance.

Ramadhan is a month meant for God's worship. I am sure you'll gain as much, if not double what you always do on its every coming.

That said, all the best and we pray that you will be granted the strength and perseverance to go through what lies ahead. In times of hardship and challenges, do not hesitate to look back on those whom loves you so much.

P/S : Teringat dulu2 pegi solat terawih ngan papa kat Kepayan. Selalu cari alasan nk solat 8-rakaat je!

PakTam said...

Assalamu`alaikum wm,

PakTam ucapkan selamat berpuasa dan selamat menjalani rawatan. Buah tamar dah prepare ke?

azfar said...

Salam Afzal,

Selamat berpuasa & selamat menjalani rawatan. InsyaAllah semua akan baik, tambah2 bulan Ramadhan ni. All the best!

joegrimjow said...

slamat ber ramadhan dan berDOKTOR

sbb tu kita diajar buat istiharah untuk dapatkan pilihan terbaik

Hafandi Ahmad said...

Jangan Menyerah - D'Masiv

Tak ada manusia
Yang terlahir sempurna
Jangan kau sesali
Segala yang telah terjadi

Kita pasti pernah
Dapatkan cobaan yang berat
Seakan hidup ini
Tak ada artinya lagi

Syukuri apa yang ada
Hidup adalah anugerah
Tetap jalani hidup ini
Melakukan yang terbaik

Tuhan pasti kan menunjukkan
Kebesaran dan kuasanya
Bagi hambanya yang sabar
Dan tak kenal Putus asa

"Selamat Berpuasa Afzal. Didoakan Semoga Afzal sabar dan tabah menempuhi dugaan di bulan ramadan..Semoga Allah s.w.t memberkati Afzal...Amin~"

Mas Afzal said...

Jep - Thanks bro, we should try n face hardships with optimism for despair will bring us nowhere.

I must admit this is without a doubt the hardest stage in my life ever, but I accept it as Allah's trials for His servants.

PakTam - Will buy some buah tamar to bring along to the hospital next week. Looking forward too see you and co in UK should I still be around!

Azfar n Joe - Ramadhan kareem guys. Mohon maaf kalau ada tersilap/terkasar bahasa, I am indeed mere mortal.

Hafandi - SubhanAllah, what a strong and inspirational lyrics, thank u v much.

Mas Afzal said...

Btw Jep, teringat pula masa terawih kat Kepayan kadang-kadang ada yang buat-buat sakit perut supaya boleh balik lepas 8 rakaat je! =)

Anonymous said...

Assalamualikum wbth,

mama doakan Afzal dapat lalui sesi chemo kali ini dengan mudah. Puasa tahun ini memang amat mencabar...Papa di KK, Jep di Melbourne, Afzal di UK, Tiqah kekadang di KK kekadang di KL..hati mama berbelah bagi tak tahu nak tumpu di mana. Hanya doa menyatukan seluruh keluaga ku di dalam hati ini. Ya Allah, engkau lindungilah seluruh ahli keluarga ku dan kembalikan mereka semua kepada ku bersekali satu hari nanti..amin.

Anonymous said...

P/S : Pada semua bloggers yang layan blog Afzal, ampun dan maaf ku pinta, semoga Ramadhan yang kita tunggu2 tahun ini akan lebih nikmat dari tahun2 terdahulu...amin...selamat berpuasa Afzal..mama.

Anonymous said...

Salam Mas,

Selamat berpuasa dan menempuh dugaan ini. Kak Zura doakan Mas dapat menghadapi segala cabaran.Insya Allah berkat bulan Ramadhan.
Kalau keadaan mengizinkan dtg rumah raya nanti.

Kak Zura/Abg Azam

Burhan said...

Salam Mas Afzal,
We love you. We pray for you. In happiness and in sadness we unite and are together for the sake of Allah. All the best to you. Pray for us too.
Abang Burhanudin Busu and Kak Zainab Kassim

rahmah said...

Kak Afzal, saya nak link blog akak boleh tak? sangat banyak pengalaman yg boleh dikongsi.. semoga akak tabah selalu..amin..

siti rahmah mokhtaruddin
ukm bangi

Mas Afzal said...

Assalamualaikum wbt,

Mom - Insya Allah mak, if Allah wills, there will come a time when all of us will be reunited again, just like the old days. But until then, we will all need to remain strong and pray for each other.

Kak Zura/Abg Azam - Saya doakan Kak Zura, Abg Azam n anak2 especially new baby sihat walafiat, dan semoga Ramadhan kali ini lebih baik dari sebelumnya. Ada rezeki saya pun harap sangat2 boleh lagi berkunjung ke teratak akak untuk Eid nanti insya Allah!

Dr Burhan - It's a nice surprise hearing from u, and thanks for the prayers and support! Please do keep them coming. Send my salams to akak Zainab too, I wish there'll be a time in da future when we can meet up again in Malaysia insya Allah.

Rahmah - U can certainly share the link of my blog, takde ape sangat pun. Moga ada la manfaat yang boleh ditimba. Btw, saya lelaki yer bukan perempuan =). Biasalah, nama Mas tu memang buat orang konfius kadang2. Takpe.

Husna Musa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rahmah said...

yeke? hehe.. sori bang..ingat akak.. mcm2 boleh blaja dr sini..pengalaman abang menjalani kehidupan yg penuh dugaan, juga penulisan yg sgt menyentuh hati..