Saturday, 16 May 2009

Hampir Ke Situ...

Assalamualaikum wbt

This week has been a really significant week for me. Not only had I finish what were hopefully my final ever examinations as a medical student, I'd also given a very impressive fight in my 11th round battle against Mr Chemo yesterday.

Never throughout my 5 years in UK had I felt so drained out preparing for an examination. I put so much effort to make up for the lost time, and even then I still felt quite uncertain come the day of my OSCE. But, as one wise friend told me the day before the exam, one can never feel fully prepared for an OSCE and I should just try my best and leave the rest to Allah.



In all fairness, I was quite satisfied with my performance during the OSCE, and I couldn't recall any stations in the OSCE where I've done horribly wrong. Ever since I started on chemotherapy treatment, I noticed that my mouth dries up quicker as the adrenaline starts pumping, so that certainly caused me a bit of trouble during the OSCE. On so many occasions during the OSCE, I went to nearby sinks to sip some water before entering the next station. It was so obvious I was struggling with the dry mouth that some of the invigilators kindly prepared a few cups of mineral water for me so that I can rehydrate myself after every stations! Even though it certainly wasn't a pleasant experience, I thought it was quite funny afterwards!

The MEQ wasn't too bad either, and I was glad that the examination invigilators gave me an extra 15 minutes rest for every hour during the exams(it was a 3hr exam so I had 3hrs 45mins in total). It certainly helped as I knew I had time on my side and there wasn't the need to rush myself with going through the questions. By the time the exam was over, there was certainly a huge relief that the worst is behind me now, until a colleague of mine reminded me of what was to come;

"So, what's the plan for tomorrow Mas, now that the exam is over?"

"Err, I guess I'll probably spend tomorrow at home treating myself to a long-awaited good rest!" [Aisey, aku ada chemo pulak esok...] =(


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"So you like Kungfu Panda too?"

Dr Morley suddenly came to greet me that morning, as I was watching Kungfu Panda with my laptop, trying hard to find ways to take my mind away from the impending chemo.

"Well, a bit of a change from revising, Dr Morley," I replied.

"Good idea Mas. My children love watching them too, especially my daughter who adores Master Tigress so much. If only they stop practicing the kungfu they learned from the Furious Five on me though!



Dr Morley really looked keen on asking me about my exams, so were Helen (Specialist Nurse), Tony and Sandra (the nurses). They've been so supportive all along, they even sent me a good luck card prior to my OSCE! I guess that's what medical staff in UK are all about, giving top class services to patient care. It's not just all about treating the underlying condition, it's dealing with the patient's social aspect that also matters a lot. After all, patients are human beings and human beings have heart and emotions, don't they?! [By the way, doctors are also human beings so treat them well to...]

The nurse who has always failed to get the cannulae into my veins was in charge of doing the honour yesterday, and finally she.....failed again. Knowing that she will never be lucky with my veins, she decided to give up after the first try and asked Sandra to take over. And Sandra, as usual managed to get it in at the first try. In terms of the chemotherapy, I was quite impressed that I didn't vomit this time around, and I played that down to the numerous Wrigleys chewing gum I had prior to being administered with the doxorubicin! Lepas ni bolehlah beli lagi Wrigleys chewing gums for the last chemo.

For the past 1 week, I've noticed myself getting short of breath with minimal exertions, as well as non-productive coughs and chest tightness. Which I mentioned to Dr Morley yesterday. I didn't think there was anything nasty going on, as I couldn't hear anything wrong on auscultating my own chest (being a sad medical student!) and so couldn't Dr Morley. My oxygen levels were good too. However, being on the cautious side, he wanted to rule out a possible bleomycin-related lung toxicity and had therefore decided to omit bleomycin from my therapy that day. He also ordered for a chest CT scan for next week just to be sure that we have not missed out anything. Insya Allah, semoga semuanya dipermudahkan Allah, I've done well so far and let's hope it will remain to be so till the end of treatment.

It's been such a long, arduous journey, and I can't believe I'm almost there. A week from now, I'll be getting my Finals' results, and the week after, my last chemotherapy. The 12th and final round of a marathon battle.

And it is at this point of time, I am reminded of Allah's saying in His Holy scripture,

So, the fact is that along with every hardship there is also ease. Indeed, with every hardship there is also ease! [Al-Insyirah,94:5-6]

Mom's coming in a week's time insya Allah. Looking forward to it. But for the time being, it's gonna be another long week fighting out against the side effects of treatment. Now, where's my domperidone...

4 comments:

PakTam said...

Assalamu`alaikum wm.

Alhamdulillah. Glad u felt good after the exams. You will do well, insya Allah. We all believe that u will find the strength too to complete the treatment.

PakTam supposed to go to Aus today, but the trip was postponed. Nampaknya, tak ada rezeki nak jumpa Jep kat sana. Kalau postpone lama sangat pun, Paktam dah malas nak pegi coz nanti sibuk ngan arrangement before the UK trip. Visa pun tak apply lagi!

Last week kitorang balik Bentong, ngemas, in preparation for wedding PakChik. The main attack - setor kat belakang rumah. We managed with 2 lorry loads. Of course, banyaklah benda-benda antik discovered & recovered. Termasuk gambar-gambar lama (and report card Mama - but that is top secret!).

The ladies concentrate kat dalam rumah (kat area depan TV), of course with Aki keeping watchful eyes on what to be kept (again!). Knowing Aki kat dalam rumah, kitorang pun dengan seberapa segeranya memunggah harta karun kat belakang tu untuk dibuang... only to be audited (again) by Aki when the lorry arrived. Tapi kira banyak juga la yang dapat "dilorikan" that day.

After that's settled, kitorang pegi tengok katil untuk PakChik. Then pegi confirm canopy. Tempat sewa canopy tu the same person yang hantar lori untuk buang harta karun tadi. Tengah kitorang sibuk kat situ, tetiba Aki pun datang jugak... dia pesan kat budak kerja kat situ something. Maybe dia cari benda yang kitorang buang! Well, that's Aki. Banyak benda yang dia treasure.

Sunday, kitorang pegi Raub. Courtesy call, sempena wedding PakChik, for Aki Chu and visit Wan We yang agak uzur.

Sunday petang semua orang balik, lepas makan kuah durian cicah roti.

OK Afzal, we all are looking very much forward to seeing u for wedding PakChik. Insya Allah u will get the strength and courage to complete the chemo and kami semua doakan kejayaan Afzal in the exams!

Love,
~PakTamMakTamAinul~

ps. Ainul tak sekolah hari ni, demam since Friday. Tapi masa kat Bentong dia seronok aje main ngan Ayad & Adi. Balik aje rumah, dah buat muka kesian pagi tadi..

Anonymous said...

Assalamualaikum wbth,

Susah juga ada dua household to look after ni...bak kata pepatah, ditelan pahit, dibuang sayang. Part of me nak balik Bentong sebab semua ada....as usual, kalau semua 5 beradik berkumpul mesti best punya, tapi kesian pulak kat papa yang dah order kek lapis Sarawak untuk dibawa ke UK.

Anyway, semua dah selesai - kek lapis dah ada kat Seri Petaling n gotong royong dah habis, part one...ada part two ke?

Apa2 harta karun yang terjumpa kat stor tu, hak cipta terpelihara tau...lepas vet baru boleh siar kat mana-mana website.

I'm still thinking apa nak masak untuk "khenduri" dengan your friends kat Sheffield nanti, but like you said, we'll find most of the ingredients kat London nanti. Already, I'm going to attempt to bring in kek lapis n murtabak for you and Aizu...kalau tak dihumban dek orang putih kat Heathrow nanti alhamdullillah la....

I hope you are resting well. At least tak payah nak fikir pasal exam dah....c u very soon...mama

farizahisa said...

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery..but today is a gift..that's why its called 'present'"...Master Oogway - Kung Fu Panda..I just love this quote!! very meaningful...kan?
Selamat me 'recover' kan diri and enjoy yourself with Mama!!
Told you the exams will be a breeze!!
Love mak Teh n pak Teh

Anonymous said...

may He give u strengths infinitely,,insyaallah